


I've been slowly decending into madness,until you happened to me.

by Ruth_Cooper



Category: Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Depressed Loki (Marvel), I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-03
Updated: 2018-12-30
Packaged: 2019-08-17 04:36:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 9
Words: 10,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16509500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ruth_Cooper/pseuds/Ruth_Cooper
Summary: After the events of Thor, before The Avengers.Peter is 17(i didn't want to write an underage fanfic)Warning!Contains graphic descriptions of self harm (blood,obviously), depressive disorder, eating disorder and violence, in general. Also one of the characters is not tolerant to members of LGBTQ society. Do not read if you are sensetive to such topics.Contains strong langage.Well, enjoy.Addition: the timeline is a HUGE mess. (Sorry about that)





	1. Chapter 1

I am walking down a poorly lit street.The lights diming and even going out for a second as I walk padt them. Even they know about me. I have been walking for hours now. Thinking about..the past events. My thights and stomach are still sore from-. I try not to think again, it might take a long time before I come back from whatever place I go into everytime I overthink. The weather is freezing-cold, not that I care. Perhaps, it is the only advantage of being a frost giant. I do not know where I am heading to. Neither do I know where am I. I needed to transport quickly anywhere from that forsaken place I used to call my home. I thank Odin for that. It was...awful.Staying there was not an option. Allfather is furious with me. Of course he is. I am a failure. I-I failed him in...everything.No wonder he had punished me when I was a chi-

That no longer matters. I think I can see someone at the bus stop.A boy. A teenager, I reckon.Maybe I will ask him where the hell am I. Yeah, right: "Hey,midgardian boy, do you happen to know in which part of America am I?".That would go nicely. Maybe I will ask him what city I am in. Yes, exactly.At least it is better than nothing. I will figure where this city is later. Or not. I was never really interested in Midgard's geography. Mythology– yes.Curses– of course.But nothing else. I came up to the bus stop, where the boy is standing at.

"Good evening, I am truly sorry for disturbing you, but could you possibly tell me what city am I in now, if that will not bother you?"

That was not that bad. The boy puts his earphones out, and says:

"I'm sorry.Have you said anything?"

Shit.

"I-I was asking i-if you could tell me what c-city am I in now?- What the fuck? -i-if thet will not trouble you. I-I mean–"

\- "Whoa, chill out.You're in New York,Queens. Are you alright?"

\- "Yes, I am perfectly fine. Thank you for your concern."

I could not help the irritated crack in my voice. Fuck. Could you stop sounding like an ancient god? Yeah, that should not be that hard. Just..act normal.

-"Bad day, huh?" He sounded a bit offended.  _You have hurt an innocent child, asshole._ Nice job.

-"I apologise for my behaviour. Yes, as I think you teenagers would say: "What a shitty day it was". Excuse me my language,please."

What did I tell about being simpler,huh?

He smiled. Thank, Odin. No, not him. Oh,my. He is blushing. Maybe he is not used to hearing swearing words before? _Now you broke an innocent child_.

-"Actually, adults also use the word "shitty". You don't gave to apologize. That's ok."

Oh, well I was not the one who broke him.

-"Do you happen to know where I can find any hotel,or something like that? I just haven't seen any."

_And why's that?_

 -"Well,you can take the same bus as I, and then,after..four stops, I guess, you will arrive right at the stop with a small cheap motel a few meters away. I'll tell you when to go out."

His voice was quivering. He is cold. I may have casted a simple heating spell on him, just enough to warm him up, but so he will not notice a sudden change. Oh, dear. I should thank him. Something usual, yet grateful.

-"That's very kind of you. Thank you."

-"No problem."

A moment after, someone has called him.

\- "Yes. Now? 'Kay. Coming."

Coming where?

-"I am so so sorry, but I have to go now. Four stops, then go out, turn right, walk forward and then, you'll see that motel I'm telling you about.There's your bus.Sorry, gotta go. Bye."

There is no bus to be seen.

-"Farewell"

What the shit biscuit?I panicked.

He is running abnormally fast. My bus arrived a couple moments after. How did he-?

I walked in an almost empty bus, exept for an old drunk gypsy sitting near the driver's cabin. I decided not to sit down, so that will not miss my stop. He was so kind to me even after I lashed out. Four stops,go out,walk a bit.

> I am standing in front of a little, neat room. My room.For now. I did not have any belongins to unpack, so I went straight to the bathroom to take a cold, refreshing shower. I went in. My thoughts came back. Come on! You were gone! Why did you come back again?! I was better without you! _No, you weren't_.No, I was not. _You know it_.I do. I turned the hot water on. Hotter. Hotter. Until it felt like burning. The water is pouring over me, making it hard for me to breathe. My thoughts do too.
> 
> .. _.failure.no wonder Thor is ashamed og you. ...you are a disgrace. ...not worthy of anything you have..._
> 
> It is like a clog forms inside me, suffocating me, but the water does not help to shut them out. -"I need...-" I swallowed down hard. As if it would help. -"I need it. Now!" My hands are shaking. I cannot conjure materials witjoutbeing spotted by Odin. I do not want to be found.I try, but fail. -" Ooh, be damned, Odin!"
> 
> I walked out of the shower cabin, not caring to turn the water off. Let it pour. I wrapped a towel aroung my waist. Then, I walked up to a mirror above the sink. Looked at myself. Felt disgust. Even I repell myself.
> 
> ...everyone's just pitying you...who would've had any feelings for you instead of fear, shame and disgust?...poor, poor Loki. ... Loki – the wicked son-
> 
> I screamed. My knuckles are bleeding. Shattered mirror falls on the floor with a sound of breaking glass. I pick one of the big, sharpest pieces. I slid down the wall near the sink. My arms bleed. My  still sore legs do too. The floor bleeds too,as does my brain.It bleeds with hundreds of unwanted thoughts. All at once. I float out of my body.
> 
> I see myself on the floor cry out. I pass out.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Um.. You know what happened before. Right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to write from Loki's and Peter's point of view in this chapter. Tell me if you mind it.

I woke up. Someone is banging at my door.

-" Mr.Loki,are you alright? Do you need to clean up the room."

Oh, bloody hell.

-"Are you there?"

I did not respond.

-"I am comming in"

No no no no no. I need to close the bathroom door. I stood up, but then slipped on my own blood, and fell painfully on my knees. Too late. The maid had come in.

She saw me, standing on my knees in a pool of blood, with nothing but a towel around my waist, with a terrifying expression on my face.

Marvelous.

\- "I am so sorry, I thought you were out." She is sorry?

-"Um..I.."

I cleared my throat.

"Could you please leave for a moment, I will get dressed."

-"Oh, yes, of course."

She left in awe and closed the bathroom door.

Oh, shit.

I got dressed left the money for the damage I have caused to the motel property. At least Odin left me the abillity to conjure money freely. That is so kind of him. What a perfect father. As if.

I climed out of the window. Luckily,the motel only had three floors, and my room was situated on the second one.

It was seven- seven thirty in the morning, I presumed. Judging only by the number of cars and people on the streets. The sun was clouded by thick layer of grey couds. It was going to rain.

I started walking forward, did not mean where to. Just move. A few minutes passed and it started to rain. How lucky am I to have an umbrella. Oh, right. I don't. Anyway, I couldn't care less about the rain. I continued walking.

I'm passing a school.There I see that boy, who helped me yesterday. I came closer to the gate, not walking in the school yard.

Wait. Who is that?

Another guy comes to him with a smug on his face. He says something that makes the boy flinch and after,he walks away, stomping in the puddle of mud, so that it splat all over the poor boy.

Why didn't he stand up for himself? Is that what midgardians call "bullying"?

Then, the boy looked in Lokis direction, as if he sensed him somehow. Shit. He saw me _. You're doomed to be a creepy stalker, dickhead_.

Peter's pov

-"What's up, Penis Parker?" Oh, no. Not again.

-"What do you want,Flash?"

-"I want you to stop lying."

What?

-"What do you mean?"

-"You think anyone believes that you have an internship in Stark Industries? Stop shitting, faggot"

I couldn't help but flinch on the last sentence. I stood there, frozen, while he poured dirt on me. Literally and figuratively.

My spidey senses came off. I looked around and saw no other then the guy I have met yesterday. Damn. I should probably apologise for running out on him. That's exactly what I'm gonna do.

Loki's pov

What is he doing? I single thought occured to me : "get the hell out of there!" But he spotted me. Too late to run. Bye regular guy.Hey stalker.

He is here. The rain stopped.

-"Hi." He said in his angelic voice.

Wha-?

-"Hi."I said dumbly.

-"Um. Look, I am so so sorry for leaving you yesterday. That was a shitty thing to do. By the way, have you found that motel?"

He sounded worried. What a prrecious child.

-"Yes, I have found it, and I should thank you for that.Also, you should not apologize for that. I mean, you have met a strange,lost man who you probably thought was drunk or high. I wouldn't help me either."

_That is true,isn't it, Loki._

-"No, no it wasn't because of that. I just needed to..help my boss with something and-. Anyway, were you...high?"

Nice one,Loki. Now he thinks you're a drug addict. _Of course he does, you look like one with your large black bags under your red eyes. Your boney white face and_ -.Stop!

-"What?No I wasn't."

-"Sorry, you just looked-

-"Like an addict."–I interrupted him quickly. 

-like you needed help,because you are lost."

Am I truly that pathetic? _Even a child feels pity for you. Dirt_.

-"Well, it doesn't matter now." –I said calmly. At least I thought I did.

His face fell a bit. I needed to change the subject of this fascinating conversation.

-"So, tell me about that other kid, you talked to earlier."

I caught a glipse of sadness and shame in his eyes. But then he smiled.Fake smile. 

-"Oh, that is my classmate, Flash-"

Only pricks are named 'Flash'.

"-he was just messing around."

-"Sooo, you're friends, or what?"

I knew they weren't.

-"Well, he is not a bad kid. Just a little bit angry with me. I mean, he has the right to be."

-"He did not seem like a nice kid." - I interrupted him. Again.

I looked into his eyes. I wanted to hear the truth, not some excuses for a brat who self-asserts by humilliating others.

He looked confused. That Flash child does bully him.

-"no, he is ."

Bloody hell, the kid doesn't know how to lie. At all.

Peter's pov

What is he doing? I told him that Flash is nice to me. I know it's not true, but who cares. I don't.

He is still looking at me. His wet, long, raven black hair is starting to dry up and the waves of it begin to look more defined.

I look away from his green eyes, and see a tiny drop of..blood running down his arm from the sleeve of his black hoodie.

-"Um, sorry, you have a.. um."

I pointed at his palm. He looked there and I saw a flash of horror in his eyes as they darted away from me. He is blushing. What the hell was that?

-"Um..must have scratched my arm somewhere."

Yeah, right. I may not be able to lie,but I can sense when someone does.

Loki's pov

Shit.Shit.Shit. He saw. What do I do?

-"Um..must have scratched my arm somewhere."

He did not look satisfyed with my answer. Brilliant lie,Loki.'I scratched it with a piece of shattered mirror. By accident of course.'

Why does it bleed, it should have healed by the time I got here.

The bell rang.Finally. This was starting to feel awkward. He did not even flinch, let alone moving. I continued:

-" Anyway, you must be going now"

-"I do.-

Phew.

-"-See you.. Later?"

Whoa. What? Me? A drug addict with blood streaming down his arms?

-" Um. I..guess?"

-"By the way,what's your name?"

Fuck.'Loki,Prince of Ass-gard,Odinson, God of Mischief. Nice to meet you.'

-"Loki. Yours?"

He looked curious. _Of course he did, dumbass._ Loki? Seriously?

-"Peter. Parker."

He smiled, walking towards the school. I couldn't help but smile too.

Peter.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decuded to post a new chapter earlier than expected. Surprise!  
> What do you think. I, personally, do not like this chapter. I don't know why. A bit too much, don't you think?  
> Love,  
> -author


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> My timeline is messed up. Sorry guys.

The rain began to pour again, even harder now.  
I saw him disappearing in the crowd of other students. He looked so fragile and alone. I wonder if he has any friends?

  
_It's you who did not have friends since the day you were born. Peter must have dozens of friends. And stop stalking him, freak, he does not want you anywhere near him._

  
Rain.Right.I got to find someplace dry. Now.  
As I walked an empty street, I slowly sank in my head. I thought about my brother. Perhaps he was the only one who cared. He was oblivious, but still sincere in his actions.

  
But he stood still while Brokkr was sewing your lips shut. And he watched when other gods to tied you up to the stone with your son's guts.

  
_But it all was your fault, wasn't it?_ It was my fault. _You deserved far worse than that,didn't you?_  I did.  
_Good boy_. I am not.

  
I snapped out of whatever state I was in and saw some sort of coffee shop, I think. I walked in and saw an empty, cosy and warm café. I sat at the table in the furthest corner of the not-that-big room.

  
I waited for the waitress to come, not wanting to bother anyone. I ordered a black coffee. There were some midgardian books in the stand, so I asked her if I could read them. She answered:"Yes, if course."

  
So I picked a random book from the third shelf of the stand full of different books of various genres.  
I read the title. "Turtles all the way down".As I wanted to spend a lot of time here, at least untill the rain stops, or my clothes dry up. I need to seem less..strange. I started reading.

  
I thought that by the time I finish the twenty-fifth chapter the rain would stop. Oh I was so wrong.  
The rain started pouring as heavy, as the fires burn in Hel. Believe me, I know.

  
After another hour passed, I looked at the clock. It was 3:10 pm. I am sick of this blasted rain.

However, I quite enjoy reading this book. I like the way its main character fights with her anxiety and OCD disorders. And she does not give up. Those midgardians do know how to write interesting books.

  
I remember a library in the palace. It was enormous. I spent most of my childhood there. The Allfather was furious with me. He thought I ought to be like Thor. Strong and brave. And have many loyal friends. But I could not be that. So he tried the other ways to make me that. Instead, he made me a monster.

  
I finished the book. The café is still empty. Wait, the door opened. Oh, shit.

Peter's pov

By the time all of my classes ended, the rain was pouring harder than ever. How am I gonna go home without an umbrella.

  
I waited until the halls were empty and walked up to my locker. I needed to take my web fluid for my suit. Maybe the rain will stop and I'll be able to train properly. As I locked my locker and turned around, I saw Flash standing inches away from me. Well that's just great.

  
-"Hey,penis-sucker,"

  
Oh how bad I want to punch that face.

  
-"What are you doing here,Flash?"

  
-"I've been waitng for you"

  
Here we go again.

  
-"What now."

  
My voice sounded...weak. It always did in situations like this.I hate that.

  
-"Stop being so smart-ass, faggot. You think you're so cool-"

  
I most certainly do not.

  
\- "pretending to work for Stark."

  
I do work for him.

  
-"What is your problem, Flash?"

  
I'm so sick of him, so I finally asked that. What a relief! Well.. is it?

  
-"Look who's suddenly became so fucking brave."

  
My heart starts pounding. I've just triggered the beast. Lucky me.

  
And then he punched me, again and again.And then he left.

  
-"See you later, Penis Parker."

  
That name almost makes me feel scared. Almost. I feel my lip bleeding. He was always careful not to touch my face, afraid he'll be seen. The last two times he wasn't.

  
I will not let him do that ever again. I will tell May. Maybe tomorrow. No, she's been throught a lot already. She doesn't need any more problems. Maybe I will tell her later. Or not.

  
I walk-run home. The rain starts pourring even heavier, if that's possible.

  
-"Ooh, fuck it."

  
I saw a small café. I've been here before. A lot. Especially after Flash.

  
The waitress, Harper,has been very nice to me since the first time I entered this place. She always stitches me up every time, and tells noone.I owe her so much.

  
So I walked in. It was empty,exept for one guy reading a book in the furthest corner.

  
-"Hey, Peter, what can I help you with- whooah. Not again."

  
She walked up to me. Her eyes filled with concern and understandment.

  
-"Erm.."

  
-"Come with me."

  
I followed her silently. She told me to sit down two tables away from that guy.I was the least visible spot, due to the large potted plant in front of the table.

Usually she told me to wait for her in the storage room, while she took her first-aid kit.  
I could see that guy's face from here- Hey, that's Loki. What us he doing here.Crap. Harper is gonna talk about Flash.

  
-"Well, tell me all about it. Don't keep it to yourself."  
Why does this keep happening to me?

  
-"Uhm, I-...I"

  
-"Go on.

  
-"Can we please..not talk about this?"

  
-"I think yes, if you wish so.Anywhere else?"

  
-"That was it.Thanks,Harper".

  
That went well.

  
-"Peter-"

  
Here we go again.

  
-"-when will you tell May about..this?"

  
-"She has got a lot to deal with now, Harper. I can't put her throught this now!"

  
I lashed out. I am such a prick.

  
-"Look, I'm sorry, Harper, it's just that... I know you won't believe me, but I got this. Alright?"

  
-"I believe you."

  
Nho-no she does not.  
I smiled, she smiled back. Everything is fine.

Loki's pov

That Flash kid. Why does he do that? What could have Peter possibly done to offend that boy?

  
Poor Peter. He is so brave.

  
The waitress left, leaving the space between us open. He saw me for the second time, so now he deffinately knows it's me. I smiled weakly at him for a moment,instead of saying 'hello'.He smiled back, but then flinched. His lip, right.

  
The waitress came back with a cup of..hot chocolate, I reckon. She looked at him than at me.

  
-"Do you know each other? Because I feel like you do. And also you've been staring at each other since I left."

  
He laughed, I couldn't help but suppress my own laughter.

  
-"We have met. Twice." He said.

  
-"I see." She sounded amused.

  
_Yeah, it's because you're amusing.Ridiculous._ No! _Yes_. No. _Yes, and you know_ _it_. Yes.. _Yes, and?_ Yes, and I know it. _Now say it like you mean it, because you do, don't you?_  
I know that I am ridiculous and pathet-  
-"You're alright,Loki?"

  
What? Ah, I'm here.

  
-"Yes, of course. Just a bit..off"

  
He stood up and sat next to me.  
I moved away a bit, it was like a reflex. 'Don't come any closer. The dog bites.'

  
He smells of rain and chocolate.

  
-"How are you doing."

  
Awful. Every single breath us harder than the last one. I feel-

  
-"I'm fine. Thank you. I see you are not, am I right?"

  
-"Oh this? I just fell over on the..erm..on the steps and-"

  
He said with a smile.

  
-"The truth, Peter."

  
Look who's got all bossy here.

  
-"I don't want to talk about it!"

  
Well. He can raise his voice.

  
-"I am sorry for invading your privacy."

  
I am. I mean, huh, why would he talk to me. I am still just a strange man, who he probably thinks is stalking him.

  
-"No. I am. It's just...Too much, you know."

  
-"I understand."

  
-"The thing is that you don't. Noone does."

  
Believe me I do.

  
-"I don't. I am sorry."

  
-"You apologize too much.Why?"

  
-"I guess-"

  
I am always guilty of everything. Anything bad happens - everyine blames me. I got used to it. Because I am. I'm everything what's wrong with the world. I am the god of fucking mischief and lies. I breathe lies, and because of that I ruin everything.  
-"-I don't know."

-"So what was that on your arm earlier? Are you alright?"

  
-"So what happened to your lower lip? Are you alright?"

  
_That was harsh,dickhead._

  
-"I get it"

  
He did not sound upset.

  
He continued:

  
-"Will you tell me if I tell you?"

  
-"Maybe."

  
-"Deal?"

  
Fuck it.

  
-"Deal."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading this fanfic.  
> Harper (the waitress) is an original character, just so you know.  
> Tell me what you think.  
> Love,  
> -author


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No summary.

How could I agree on that?

_Now he will think you're some kind of sloppy, desperate for attention creep.Oh wait. YOU ARE, BASTARD! Say it. Say it!_

I am a-

-"Who's gonna go first?"

Not me,please.

-"You're the one who had the idea, so you're gonna go first."

-"That's not fair." He said.

-"It is."

-"Okay, it is"

-"Told you"

-"Shut up." He said throught a bright smile.

I put my hands on the table and leaned a bit forward, facing him.

-"I'm listenning"

Peter's pov

-"I'm listenning"

I'm gonna regret this, aren't I?

-"Well-um,do you remember that Flash kid you saw in the morning?"

He nodded.

-"It was him."

There, I've said it. Enough?

-"Why did he do that?"

Not enough, apparently.

-"I don't really know" I lied.

And I hate doing it. I feel like a bad person. I chuckled nervously.

-"Don't lie to me,please. We had a deal."

-"Right. I guess he is angry at me, because I work at Stark Industries, and the word got out,somehow. I didn't tell anybody. I swear, I-"

\- "I believe you, Peter. You don't know how to lie, it is obvious when you do."

That is what I call a bitter truth.

-"I can lie" I smiled.

-"You can't". He smiled at me. His eyes lit up a bit.

-"I can't"

You'd be surprised.

-"Told you"

-"Stop"

We looked at each other for no more than five moments, everything seemed to be alright, until Loki's eyes filled with pure sorrow.

He shifted in his seat.

-"How long have this been going on?"

Should I lie? Nope, that's pointless.

-"For almost tree years..I guess.."

I looked down, but I had already caught a tiny glimpse of his knuckles. They were white. As was his face.

-"And you haven't told anyone?"

-"No. Exept for Harper, the waitress"

Who, by the way, has been watching us like a hawk.

-"That's-"

Stupid

-"I'd even say heroic of you"

-"Nooo, I'm just- I guess- I'm scared that he will be even more angry at me than before. And I don't want my aunt to worry about me. She has been throught a lot."

-"That is why I think you're brave, Peter.You suffer for the sake of others."

That is kind of him.

-"Erm.."

Yeah, that's all I could get out. He looks at me. I try to avoid his glance.

-"You have a heart, Peter. A good one."

-"I'd rather not. If it means going throught all this."

-"You don't want that"

-"Why not?"

-"I don't. And I do not recommend it"  
He said with a smile. 

-"You do have it. You just don't know it yet"

A long silence washed over them, like waves of the ocean, which dulls everything away. Exept for one thing – numbness.

Loki's pov

 _And guess whose fault is this._ _You are the reason this kid suffers.You are the reason evil exists in the world._

Peter's pov

-"Could you tell me where else did he hit you today?"

Fuck. I don't want him to think that I'm some kind if a punching bag.

-"My jaw"

-"And..?"

Pause.

-"My abdomen and my shoulder"

I started to fiddle with the end of my blue sweater.

My eyes are watering. What the hell?

-"Should I tell..Harper about this?" He asked quietly.

-"No! No, I'm alright."

He chuckled.

-"And you keep saying that you are alright. Are you?"

Single tear falls off my eylashes right on my hand. I hope he didn't see that.

-"I guess, not as fine, as I thought I was..." I whispered.

-"Here you go" He hugged me.

I burried my face in his hoodie. He smelled of a forest after rain. I breathed in his scent. He patted my back.

-"Thank you"

I mumbled in his shoulder.

-"Anytime,kid. Anytime."

I just realized how slim and bony he was. Almost too slim.

We sat there in silence.

But, somehow, that was enough.

Now it's his turn.

Loki's pov

I'm gonna kill him. How dare he do that to Peter. Son of a b-

-"Thank you"

Oh my. That precious kid. _Your fault_. How selfless he is to do that. _Your fault_. I need to do something about it to help him. _Your fault_. Stop. _Your fault._ Please. _Your fault._

-"It's your turn. Tell me all about it."

Crap.

-"What do you want to know?"

-"Well, at least tell me about the blood"

-"As I have said before, it was barely a scratch. And no, I don't know where it came from."

-"Alright.-"

That's it?

-"-Then show me"

-"What?" I said with fake disbelief.

-"Show me your arm"

-"Why? As I have already said, it is a scratch, nothing to worry about."

-"Then show me."

I gulped and looked at my knees.

-"Why did you do that?" he said.

-"Do what?"

-"Stop lying to me, please. I told you my story. We had a deal.."

_Nice job. You made that kid sad._

-"I had some issues with my family and myself, okay? Are you happy now?"

\- "Only your arm?"

-"Yes"

He took a sanitazing gel out if his bag, and disinfected his arms with it.

-"Could you show it to me? I'll see if your cuts are not infected."

Pause. I looked aside and rolled the sleeve if my left arm up to the elbow. Not an inch higher. It did not end threre.

-"Holy-" I heard him mumble under his breath.

My arm looked..awful. Scars over scars. Cuts over cuts.

I watched him as he observed my arm. Carefully tracing the cuts with his fingers, not to cause me any pain. Even when he knows that it is the only thing I dit that for.

-"Um. They don't seem to be infected. I think"

-"I figured that too" He looked at me.

-"I'm not gonna tell you to stop,but-"

Here we go.

-"-you should. Please."

For you,kid? Anything. _You won't stop_. I won't.

-"Do you feel like telling me about it?"

_No, you don't!_

-"You do not want to hear it,Peter."

_I said STOP!_

-"I do.Every single word of it."

What the-

-"Urm. I mean. I do."

Silence.

My heart starts pounding.

 _He does not want to hear it!_ _He has got enough problems without you. Don't you dare, Loki! You'll ruin him! You won't tell anyone! You are burden for him! Don't make it any harder. You-_

-"Loki? You're here?"

I cleared my throat.

Pause.

He does not look away from me even for a moment.

I'm so tired of all this.

-"It all started after the-"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry if anyone doesn't like this chapter. I don't either.  
> Love,  
> -author


	5. Chapter 5

-"It all started after I found out that I was adopted. That was why my father always favored my brother to me. Because I was a stranger to him.  
I prefered reading books to making friends. So I did not have any.  
My brother, on the contrary, was popular,friendly,handsome, muscular and successful. I could never be his equel. He was everything that I wasn't-"

  
I breathed out.

  
-"-Father did not approve of me spending all my time in the library. He tried to get me out of there with words. Then threats. Then he got that it won't change me. So he- he..."

  
I gulped.

  
-"You can tell me."

  
Silence.

  
-"Um..he tried other ways.."

  
-"What ways?" He breathed the words out.

  
That does it.

  
-"He used to beat the shit out of me just because I did not fit in. Happy now?!" My voice quivered at the last sentence.

  
_Weak_. Shut up.

  
-"I don't know what to say.."

  
I chuckled. Of course you don't.

 

He added then:  
-"What a shitty father. No wonder that you -"

  
-"Are a freak?" I interrupted

.  
-"What? No,Loki. How can you say that? You did not deserve it. If a person does not fit in, it does not give anyone the right to do..that"

  
But I did deserve it. I am not right. I-I'm fucking broken.

  
I feel my eyes watering. I smiled at him.

  
-"The thing is, that he was right."

  
I saw his expression change. He seemed shocked. He shouldn't be.

  
_You are absolutely right, dumbass._

  
I continued:  
\- "I was..um..wrong. I should have made him proud. But I embarassed him. Time after time."

  
It gets harder to breathe.

  
\- "How can you say that?" He whispered .

  
-"Because it's true" I answered quietly.

  
I need to get out.

  
I felt a tear streaming down my face.  
Shit. That's enough.

  
I need to get out.

  
-"Um-.I have to go now" I said, standing up.

  
I need to get out.

  
I left the money for my coffee, not bothering to pick up the change.

I need to get out.

I headed for the door. Peter stood up and caught my wrist. I flinched. My cuts hurt. He saw my reaction and quickly let go of it.

  
-"I'm sorry. See you around" I said.

  
I ran out of the café. And just ran.

  
Cold wind blows into my face.

  
That was too much.I'm sinking. Once again.

  
I saw a park, found a bench under a tree. I needed to sit down. I need to eat more. I can't go on like this.

  
_Yes you can,worthless shit! I told you he won't understand. You should have listened to me. From now on you will,won't you?_

I will.

_Say it!_

-"I will"

I'm fucking insane. I need to get away from Peter. I'll ruin him.

  
I saw Peter running past the park, looking for me. He must be cold.

  
_No he is not. Why would he?_

  
No, he is not.

  
I waited for him to come back into cafe, so that I won't run into him on the streets.

There he is.

  
Don't look around.Don't look around.Don't look around. And you did. Fuck.

  
-"Loki" He said out of breath, as he aproached me.

  
-"Don't, Peter.Go away."

  
The wind starts blowing fast. Like it does before the storm.  
He sat next to me. I stood up.

  
-"I don't think we should talk anymore."

  
-"Wha-.Why?"

  
-"I'm a bad influence. And I feel better by being alone"

  
-"Tell me what did I do to upset you."

  
-"You don't get it,do you?"

  
-"Then explain it to me, please. I want to know you."

  
-"IT'S ME!It's always been me! I'M the problem!"

  
Silence. The wind continues blowing fast. The leaves are dancing in the light of the setting sun.

He stood up.

Peter's pov

I need him to tell everything to me. I want to be there for him. But I can't, unless he tells me how can I help.

I stood up.

He stepped back immediatly.

\- "Loki, please, don't"

\- "I'm sorry. I can't".

He turned around and began to walk away. I thought about catching him by his wrist, but I remember about the cuts. So I caught him by his shoulder. He flinched violently.

Wha-.

Loki's pov

My shoulder hurt badly.Once I cut deep there.Now it hurts badly. I told him to go away. I warned him.

  
My hands lit up. Literally. I could not stop it. And I did not want to. I need to scare him off, if he won't go away himself. I will never hurt him, but he doesn't know that.

  
I looked over my shoulder. He was horrified.

  
-"Let go of me!" I said with an irritating note in my voice.

  
He blinked rapidly. And then let go.

-"I told you."

He stood there frozen as I walked away, trying to keep my tears at bay.

  
_You did the right thing. You don't need help._

I don't.

But Peter is bullied by that tiny-dick- Flash. He needs help.

 _Not from you. He is better off without you_.

I don't think so.

_You disobey me? You know what will happen._

I do.

  
I walked for hours until it was near midnidnight. I needed someplace to stay for the night. And, as if by some kind of fucked up design, I can't find any.

  
I continued strolling throught the streets.

  
Few minutes have passed, and I saw some shitty-looking pub in the dark street to my left. I headed there.

  
As I made a turn into the street, two wasted men exited the pub.  
At least someone's having fun.

I walked past them.

-"Hey, handsome. Let's rent a room upstairs 'n have some fun?"

I turned around.They started laughing.I came up to them and kissed the man, who wanted to 'rent a room' roughly.

After, I walked away, wiped my mouth with the back of my palm and smirked.

That man slipped, fell on his erected dick and broke his pelvis on the stone. By accident, of course.

  
Did he say anything about a room for rent?

  
I walked in and, after I came up to the bar, asked the manager, or so I think, wheather I can rent a room upstairs.  
He said that I can, but I need to pay for the night here and now. So I did as I was told.

  
The room was a tiny bit smaller than the one I rented at the motel. But that was enough for me. There were some books on the coffee table. Now I know how to spend my evening.

  
I stepped into the bathroom. There was no mirror.

Crap.

I quickly took a shower, changed my clothes from a black hoodie and black jeans to a dark, almost black, green plain sweater and black jeans, which I conjured. I did not need to use my seiðr much to do that.So Odin won't be able to find me.

  
Also I dryed my hair with a towel and put it in a bun. It was easier to read that way.

  
My head went round.

I nearly fained, but I had enough time to grasp the ledge of the wall with my hand. It happends more often, than before. I need to eat.

_No, you don't._

Yes I do, if not – I'll fucking die.

_But just a little. Don't waste too much food on yourself._

Okay.

I went in the tiny kitchen and checked the cupboards for food.In one of them, I saw a knife. A proper one for-...using.

  
I took it, and placed fifty dollars on its place. I don't how much those knives cost.

  
I found some cookies.

I tried not to think about what happened earlier, with Peter. It's better that way.

  
The books were shitty. However, I found one, that I liked more than any of the others. Someone must have forgotten it here.

  
I picked a book called "Red Queen".

  
Midgardians do not know anything about real powers, do they? And one if the characters is a bisexual liar. How can she not notice it.

  
_Bisexual liar. Sound familiar? Hm.._  
_Oh, here you are, Loki. Don't you see the similarity? You do._

  
I could not read anymore. The words blurred out, instead I saw all the words I have been called. All the lies I have said.All the shamefull things that I've done.

  
I grabbed the knife. I stood in front of the bathroom sink, pulled the sleeve of my right arm up.That arm has not been cut, yet. I promised myself just one cut.I cut deep.

  
Looking down, I gasped. Shit. Shit. Shit. The cut was too deep for me to handle on my own. I conjured a bandage. Aplied it. Another one.  
The blood pumps. I changed both of them, and applied new ones.

I ran out of my room.

Peter's pov

I am sitting in my bed. Just finished preparing for a test. I lied down, thinking about Loki. Why did he do that? I could have been there for him. He was there for me, when I told him about Flash.  
All of the sudden, my spidey-senses came off.  
I need to find him.

Loki's pov

-"Where is the nearest hospital?" I asked barman hurriedly, my both arms behind my back, the left one on my right putting pressure on the wound.

-"Um. You need to get to the main steet, and then walk forward."

Yeah, that's helpfull. I'll find it on my own.

I rushed out of the pub, and walked out of the shade of that dark street. I walked as quickly as I could. Tried to stay calm. Shit. The blood soaked my sweater. I pressed harder. It's going to bruise.

  
Why are the streets empty? I could've asked someone about the hospital, but no. Ah, it's 1am.

  
I feel myself slowly slipping somewhere. Just don't faint. Come on! It gets harder to move.

  
A lean on the street light. I can't hear anything exepty my own breathing, and some quiet voices in the background. Snap out of it!

Peter's pov

I web my way throught the city, searching for Loki.

  
I can't see him. My senses go wild. Something bad is happening to him.

  
After what seemed like hours of looking, I finally saw a dark crumpled figure, leaning on the street light. Yep, that's Lokes.

  
I've made my way down, and ran to him.

  
-"Loki?"

  
Fucking hell! His arm is drained in blood. I need to get him to Mr. Stark.

Loki's pov

Someone is here. Finally.

  
-"Loki?"

  
I can barely catch what he had said.

I'm falling down.

 

Peter's pov

He fainted.

  
I pick him up, carefully, by his tiny slim waist. He's as white as snow. And as cold as it too.

  
I use my webs to get to the Stark tower.

I've put some of it on the wound. I

don't want to go to the hospital, because I don't want Loki to go throught all that.Besides, what if he ..does THAT thing again.Mr. Stark will do something and not say a word, will he? I hope so.

  
I arrived.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Contains minor spoilers for "Red queen".  
> By the way, if anyone read that book, don't hate me for what I've said about Maven. I love him with all my heart. I guess I have a type.)
> 
> I am sorry guys. I don't like the way this story goes.  
> I highly doubt that I will continue writting it. Sorry again.  
> All the best,  
> -author


	6. Not a chapter.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An important (for some of you..perhaps...) note.

I decided to continue writting this fanfiction.

Thank you for all of your comments. I almost sure that I will post the next chapter the next wednesday.

Apologies for making you wait.

Love,

-author

P.S.: if you have any suggestions, you are more than welcome to write them in the comments.


	7. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally. Well, not for all of you, I guess.  
> Enjoy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hate the way this fiction goes with all my heart. Yeah, it's interesting and fun to write it, but as I reread it – I regret those turns I took (Not me. The characters). Well, can't change the past. Unfortunatelly.

Peter's pov

I rushed in the tower.

  
-"Jarvis!" I said in my whisper-screeming voice. It doesn't make sense. Doesn't matter.

  
-''Mr. Parker, you need to go to the hospital wing, which is located on the second floor of the tower. I have already informed Mr.Stark of your unexpected arrival." Said A.I.

  
How grateful am I to him.

  
-"Why isn't he waking up? He should've by now. Can you check his vitals or something please?" I asked Jarvis, while riding in the elevator with limp Loki in my arms. My voice quivered due to my worry.

  
-"It appears,that your friend has lost a significant amount of blood. I would say, that he should have been dead by now-" the A.I answered.

  
-"What?!"

  
-"-but he is not, mr.Parker. "

  
Well that's a relief.

  
I ran into one of the hospital rooms with limp body of Loki's in my arms. Mr Stark and Bruce Banner are waiting there.

  
-"Holy fuck" Mr Stark cursed. Agreed.

  
I placed Loki on the bed, the scientist immediately starts to examine him.As mr.Stark looked at Loki's severely injured arm, still bleeding heavily. He told me to wait outside the room.

  
-"No, no. I'll wait here. Please, mr. Stark."

  
-"Peter. Outside. Now."

  
Fuck.

  
But I don't want to leave. What if he wakes up and sees two strange men, hovering over him? What if he..lights up again? I need to be there.

  
I opened the door but, after a second if thinking, walked back inside.

  
-"I'm not going anywhere. I'm not leaving him."

  
I said in the most serious way I could.

  
-"Okay." Stark answered simply.

  
Alright.

  
After almost an hour of stiching, blood transfusing, checking the stitches over and over, and making sure that no infection entered his body throught the wound, Loki was finally ready to rest.

  
I sat beside him, while he slept. He looked so peaceful and calm.His chest is rising steadilly.Up. Down.Everything seemed normal.

I played that 'burning' episode over and over in my mind. What the fuck was that?

  
-"Peter, come with me" I heard mr.Stark say.  
I did as he told me to.

  
We sat in the living room on the couch.

  
-"Peter, I told you not to bring any more strange or bleeding guys here."

  
-"But, mr.Stark, he is not a strange guy, and-"

  
Mr.Stark shushed me with his hand.

  
-"I-I'll stop you there. Now tell me, where have you met him?"

  
-"What?"

  
-"You said that he is not a stranger to you. "

  
-"Oh, that. Well, I once helped him find a motel, and... we met in this coffee shop, a day after.."

  
-"What? Peter,I don't want you near that guy"

  
-"What? No! I'm not abandoning him! Have you not seen the state he's in? He-he..He needs help, mr.Stark"

I looked down in my knees but still felt his gaze on my cracked lip.

  
I fiddled with my fingers while talking to Tony. Stark. Nothing unusual.

  
-"I'll take your suit, if you will not do that"

Mr. Stark crossed his arms. Something was off about the way he said that.

  
What is up with him? Why does he hate Loki this much? I mean.. yeah, I often bring broken things into the tower. But he hasn't been so strict. Ever.

  
-"Okay. Take it." I said a bit harshly. I didn't mean to do that.

  
I'll better run around the town in a red hoodie and sweatpants than have blood on my hands. The guy is drowning.

  
-"I was joking, kid. Jesus Christ. So what's up with that guy, what's his name?"

  
-"Loki."

  
-"What a name. Huh." He said smirking.

  
-"We just met, somehow. Three times..."

  
Somehow. I can't quite figure out exactly how'd that happen.

  
-"Three times? So what, is he your friend,or...what?"

  
He knows perfectly that I don't have much friends. I am no good at making them. At least not normal one's.

  
-"Well, I mean I-. I don't know. The last time I saw him, we were talking. And then his mood changed. He flew out of the café and...-"

  
-"Wait, he ran out on you?"

  
-"What? No, no we're not-. No, mr.Stark, we have met only two days ago."

  
-"Sorry, kid. Got that one wrong"

  
-"Yeah.." I breathed out.

  
The billionaire tends to make fast desicions. Often.  
Pause. He looks at me in his..fatherly way, I try to avoid his gaze.

  
-"Tell me. Do you know why did he-"

  
-"Tony, I need you to see something"

  
Bruce cut him off in the mid-sentence, rushing out of the roon where Loki was layed. He seemed worried.

  
Oh shit. He must be doing that thing again.

  
-"Stay here, Pete."

  
I came after them.

  
-"I told you to stay-. You know what? Forget it. It's pointless. "

  
-"It is" I nodded.

  
We entered the room. Loki's lying there, his eyes closed. He fucking turned blue.

  
What the-

  
-"Mr.Stark, I don't know what's happening. What is that?"

  
Insteat,Bruce Banner answered:

  
-"His cut has healed completely, after he..became this way. His temperature is significantly low. My guesses are he's not human. He'd be dead if he were. But that is not normal at all. I've also noticed that some medications don't work on him."

  
-"Sir, it appeares we have a guest. He presented himself as Thor Odinson." A.I. adressed mr.Stark.  
What the heck is happening?

Tony's pov

Is that Loki guy cursed, or something?

  
-"Jarvis, tell our guest to meet me on the second floor."

  
-" Sir, he refuses to get into 'a small metal box' and wants to meet you immediately."

  
A small metal box? Who's that guy, again?

  
-"Tell him I'm coming"

  
-"Yes,sir"

  
It's gonna be a long night. And morning, I pressume.

  
After I walked the long dark hallways leading to the main living room.

There I witnessed a tall, muscular man with barbie-blonde hair standing, leaning on one of the shelves, filled with books of any kind.  
When barbie saw me he gripped the huge metal hammer in his hand.  
-"Who are you and what did you come here for?"

  
The blond took a step towards me. Maybe I should've put my suit in, only in case of...

  
-"I am Thor Odinson-"

  
What the fuck? Like the norse god from ancuent myths? He must be kidding me.

  
-"- I have come here to take my brother back to Asgard,for he commited a crime that he shall be punished for by the Allfather."

  
Wow. Loki is a norse god too. I knew I've heard that strange name before. In the past few hours I have met two gods. I thought nothing would surprise me.

  
-"Look, you and your brother may go as soon as he gets better."

  
-"Better? What has happened? Have you him caused him harm? I swea-"

  
Thor pointed his hammer at me. This is it.

  
-"Jarvis, my suit"

  
-"Done, Sir." The A.I. answeared immediately.  
My body was shielded by armored metal suit. Oh I love that feeling.

  
-"No games, Shakespeare"

  
-"Look, man of Iron. I want my brother back this second."

-" Hm. Too bad. You can't have him now. He is being treated. So tell that to your..father."

  
Why am even protecting that Loki? He could cause Peter harm. And what crime has he commited? Maybe he killed someone.

  
-"Listen, you can wait here until he wakes up.Deal?"  
-"No. I want to see him.Show me"

  
Dense creature.

  
-"Okay. As your majesty desires."

  
I breathed out and guided the hammer-head to the hospital wing.

  
-"You'll have to get into the 'metal box'. "  
  
Peter's pov

I paced around the room my hands running throught my hair time after time.

Then, the beeping of the I.V. increased. Bruce Banner stood up from his seat and began to examine Loki.

  
His legs began to shake, his arms jerked and his head pushed into the cushion. The muscles of his abdomen contracted.

  
-"He's having a seizure."

  
-"I know, but the sedative doesn't seem to work on him."

  
The scientist took a sterile towel and put it into Loki's mouth, preventing him from bitting down on his tongue or cheeks.

  
I couldn't stand watching Loki's body twitch violently. The question is: what caused him to?

  
My heart skipped a beat when the beating of his stopped in time with the seizure. He changed his color back to pale human.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you think? I appreciate all of your comments, so go ahead.  
> Love,  
> -author.


	8. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Peter's pov)  
> The timeline in this fic is wrong. Waaay messed up. Too late to change that. My apologies.

-"What is happening, mr. Banner?"

  
The scientist did not respond. He just rummaged through the pile of different bottles, pills and syringes hurriedly. Then he pulled the tiny bottle filled with light blue, almost transperent liquid and a syringe with a slip tip needle, then filled it with that blue liquid. In a rush, mr.Banner found the cephalic vein in Loki's hand and injected the medicine, or whatever that was.

  
At that moment mr. Stark appeared at the door with a blonde man, dressed as some mythological...god, or something like that. The stranger looked furious as he saw Loki, lying there without moving.

  
-"What have you done to my brother, humans!?"  
Brother? What the hell?! Loki didn't tell me anything about his brother.

  
The calm, regular beeping of the machine filled the room. I breathed out in relief. Well, he hasn't died.

  
-"They saved his life,dumbass,while you were flying around in space or wherever you came from. "

  
The larger man looked at mr.Stark in rage. For a moment I thought they'll start a fight right here.

  
-"I want Loki transfered to Asgard. I am taking him this second to the court of Allfather." The blond man said in low voice.

  
Iron Man aimed the blasters in his hand at blond's head. But soon we figured out that it was pointless.

  
The stranger smiled and said, looking up:  
-"Heimdall?"

  
A rainbow-like energy current appeared around Loki's bed and the man. He's gonna rake him away. How do I trust that guy? Maybe he's some pervert, who's knee-deep in human trafficing.Provided that it exists in other universes...Or maybe Loki is gonna be sentenced to death by that allfather.  
Without giving it a second thought I ran in the light current.

  
Crap. Actually, I don't regret it as much as I thought I would. If Loki had a brother, he'd tell me, wouldn't he?

  
I felt my body being flied throught some colorful glass-like tube by an unknown force. If only mr.Stark have seen it...No, he'd probably freak out. He certainly would.

  
I think I'm gonna be sick.

  
As the last thought occured, my feet landed on firm ground. No, not ground. Metal floor?

  
I looked around, searching for a familliar face. But, to my horror I saw a man in golden armor holding a fucking sword. And I'm wearing a hoodie. I might start to regret few of my last choices soon.

  
The warrior, or so I think, spoke in a calm, but strict voice:

  
-"I know who are you and why you seek Loki and Thor Odinson. But, in the name of Allfather I forbid you to enter the grounds of Asgard."

  
I don't know any 'Asgard' place. Where am I?

  
I stood there feeling panic and anxiety rising up, almost reaching my brain. I held on to my consious state, forcing fear down.

  
-"If that is so, then I would like to have an appointment with...Allfather. If that is possible."

  
Appointment? Really, Peter? Nice one. I knew I'll get myself killed someday. But I hoped that that day would come after I'm eighteen.

  
The armored men looked down on me, narrowing his eyes. The hell he's tall!

  
After some moments of silence I was granted a permission to 'speak the matter of my tresspassing arrival to Odin'. Isn't that a god from norse myths?It is... I can't believe it! Is it some sort of joke? No, it's way too real.

  
After the taller man closed the so called 'Bifrost' thing, he told me to follow him.

  
We walked the abnormally long glass bridge, that was colored like the current I came here by.

The landscape is unimaginably astonishing. And those are not the fitting words to describe it. The large golden castle,that reminds me if the upper part of an organ. An incredibly large one. The color of the castle fits the color of the burning sky, lit up by setting sun. The water looks like liquid gold, flowing calmly and washing off the stones that seem to grow out of the water, stabbing it throught.

  
And then I remembered why I am here in the first place. Loki. I need to get him back to Earth, so I pressume.

  
Or at least make sure that he'll be alright here.  
My words shattered the silence.

  
-"I am sorry if I break some rules while dicussing the cause of my arrival with the Allfather, for I know none of them." I said that in the most serious and grown-up-like voice I could have. The men looked at me, smiling.

  
-"You don't fit in, so don't try to. You look funny."  
I frowned in disbelief. Ha-ha. Very funny. Well, I tried.

  
-"How can I call you? Not a men in shinning armour, I guess."

  
-" For you? You may call me 'Heimadall, the watcher if worlds, the protector'."

  
-"I don't think I can remember that..."

  
All I got was a smirk. I thought he'll kill me for joking.

  
When we reached the main...square I watched people that were dressed waaay differently from what I was dressed in pushing towards the castle. Is there some sort of fair, or any kind of event going on?

  
-"mr.Heimall, could you tell me what is going on?"  
He just watched the crowd move and tried to get past the mass of people.

  
After some time of struggling to get through, we reached the first rows of asgardians.

  
I watched Loki, Thor and an old bearded man, the Allfather, standing on a platform. Loki's hands were chained. For what? The court...

  
-"Heimdall, for what-"  
I was cut off in the mid-sentence.

  
-"Loki used magic that he was forbidden to. Plus he has ran away without Odin's permission to do so. He tried to destroy the world of frost giants. So there's that.-"

  
Really? And they're going to punish him? I know that he broke the law, but nothing awfully wrong happened. Did it? I mean.. yeah he tried to 'destroy the world of giants'. _Tried._

  
-"-And he is mad. Always craves attention.Also-"  
He stopped at mid-sentence. What did he not tell me?

  
-"-You shouldn't be near him if you want to live a normal life. A safe life."

  
What? I don't believe him. Of course, everything could be true after I was brought here by a rainbow. He can't be that bad. Yeah, I remember that time when his hands lit up, now I get it. But he won't kill me. Of course,I don't know him that well but...

Turnsout that I don't know anything about Loki.  
Then I tried to understand what Odin said.

Fortunatelly, my spidey-powers (...) are still here.

  
-"As his punishment, Loki of Asgard will be stripped off his powers and locked up in the prison cell. The time of his punishment and it's type is to be chosen by the members of the court."

  
At the last sentence Loki's face was lit up by a smile. Not a sincere one, but the one you have at the end if a bad day, thinking 'at least I didn't die. Not yet'.

  
Type of punishment?

  
What, like community service? I don't think so, I mean... look at this place.

  
The citizens started to leave as Odin and his son left. Loki followed them, guards watching over him like vultures.

  
After a quite long time of standing dumbly in front of the castle's gates, most of the asgardians went away, carrying on with their lives. Heimdall spoke to me:

  
-"Come with me" he said walking towards the castle's entrance.

  
The walls of the castle were towering over the golden titled floor.

  
As we approached the throne where Odin sat, I caught a glimpse of Loki being led away by his chained hands into the prison basement...or something.

  
Heimdall stopped, aproximatelly thirteen feet apart.

  
-"Allfather, this child demanded an 'appointment' with you on behalf of his arrival with your son and Loki."

  
Child.I am almost eighteen. Whatever.

  
-"And you have agreed on that? Do you mind letting me know why?"

  
Odin spoke as if I was not here. Hello?!

  
-"I saw him helping Loki get to the midgardian-"  
A short pause, the warrior looked at me.  
-"-hospital. I thought-"

  
The Allfather cut him off.

  
-"That is exactly why you should have brought him back! Helping that filthy frost giant-"

  
Whoa. That's enough of pouring dirt all over Loki.

  
-" Allfather, I apoligise for my actions, but my worry over your son's future caused them. I had no idea that he will be transported here, to his..family."

  
-"So now you will get back, won't you?'

  
-"I-"

  
And then I heard a muffled scream from underneeth my feet. Loki. It sounded like him. What the hell is going on?

  
It doesn't seem like anyone else in the great hall heard it. Sometimes I forget about my increased hearing.

  
-"You what?"

  
I totally forgot what I wanted to say. But it doesn't matter anymore.

  
I cleared my throat.

  
-"I will return after I see Loki for the last time. If I could."

  
I clenched my fists, digging my fingernails into the sleeves of my hoodie. What if he won't let me? I'm a kid that broke the law of his...kingdom. He could lock me up as well, if he wished to.

  
Another scream. Maybe Loki's really faking it. If I think about what Heimdall said... What is wrong with me?!

  
-"You may go, Heimdall. Our guest will get what he required and then return to Midgard. Guards!"

  
Guards? Goodbye dear freedom.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you think about this chapter? Let me know please.
> 
> Love,  
> -author


	9. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: mentions/descriptions of past rape.

Two armoured man approached the throne.

Odin asked them to 'inform Loki about his guest', but it sounded like he was asking them to clean up the mess they've made.

Stop it! You don't even know what has happened.

  
I was led down the long staircase into the prison cell block.

  
It was dark, lit up by some sort of electrical shield and white lights in the cells.

  
We passed three, five, seven 'cages' when I finally saw Loki, leaning on the farthest wall, staring at nothing far away.

His eyes were red, standing out on the pale white of his face. The blackness of his hair looked like a hurricane, framing his sharp cheekbones. Loki was dressed in wrinkled green robes, matching the faded green of his eyes, that were drowned in the gray of the bags under his watery eyes.

  
When Loki saw me he put on a fake smile. His dry lips cracked, making blood gather on the wounds.

  
-"What are you doing here, Peter?How?"

  
The guards watched the god like he was some sort of a toy, while Loki stepped closer to the fence.

  
-"I wanted to see where that blond took you. I didn't know you lived..here. Oh and by the way, you're a god. Why didn't you tell me?"

  
A laugh escaped his bloody lips.

  
-"A god who is locked up. Funny.  
You wouldn't believe if I did."

  
He put his arms behind his back.

  
After a short pause I wanted to ask him about the arm, but then decided not to mention it. Don't know why.

  
-"So, what court has decided about your punishment."

  
At first he looked at me confusingly, but then breathed out a chuckle, while coming closer to the barrier. What's so funny?

  
-"The thing is, Peter, there's no court. Another play of my fath- Odin.-"

  
The next sentence was adressed to the guards.

  
-"-Those honorable men choose my punishment, due to their needs. And I am certain that I will not see the light of the day ever again. "

  
I could almost feel what Loki felt at that moment.What did they do to him?  
I turned around to face the guards.

  
-"Could we talk in private?"

  
They exchanged glances and then stepped away, far enough not to hear our quiet conversation, but too close for us to try to escape.

  
I stood as close as I could to the fence, but Loki didn't move from the center of the room.

  
-"If you could tell me what did they do to you – I could convince mr.Stark to get you out of here. Or at least do something. I...-I-."

  
Loki merely shrugged his shoulders.

  
-"Nothing. They did not do anything to me. At least not yet. Wh-"

  
He lied. I am certain that the screams I've heard were his. Plus hi looks awful. I cut him off, before he could change the subject of this conversation.

  
-"Loki I've heard screems. Your screams." I whispered.

  
The smile on his face dissapeared for a moment. But after the glimpse of giving in, he closed the tiny hole in his walls. The smile appeared once again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please tell me if I should try to change the way this story goes. I don't really see the point in all this mess. Tell me what you think.
> 
> Lots of love,  
> -author
> 
> P.S: happy new year everybody!


End file.
